Stop
Turn off all sounds
Close your eyes
Slow your breathing
Focus on every breath you take
Let your heart slow down
Don't stop until you can feel your heart beat
Open your eyes
Now that you've discovered the art of calming down, take a look at your situation. There are things that are going well and things that aren't. There are things that you can control and things that you can't. It's really easy to discern the difference between the first pair. The second, often times, is blurred.
I know you've read/said this thing hundreds of times. Here's where something changes. Instead of waiting to be "granted" the wisdom to know the difference, get your ass up and look for it. Just like everything else you've ever learned on your own.
You learned to speak by imitating those around you and perfecting the art.
You learned to walk by seeing it happen around you and working at improving your balance.
You learned to fight by learning from your losses.
You learned to be yourself by feeling the disconnect of being who others want you to be.
None of this was easy, but you committed yourself to reaching the goal that you set for yourself. You never had to actually ask for the strength to learn to walk or the patience to learn to speak. Wisdom isn't granted. It's earned.
Once you understand the world around you, you can understand what you can and cannot change. If you don't like what you cannot change, then remove it from your life. Though it doesn't change whatever it is, it changes where it is in relation to you.
The storm isn't as bad from hundreds of miles away as it is when you stand right in it's eye.
The things you can change, change them. I won't guarantee that it will be easy. I also won't guarantee that it will be difficult. One more guarantee that I won't make is that you'll immediately like where you end up or how the people currently in your life see you.
The most important part is that you change for you and no one else.
If the people near you leave, that means that they fell in love with the wrong you. Fear not, though. In time, the you that you let show through will be seen by everyone else and just the same way the others flocked to the old you, more will do so to the true you. I WILL promise that these people will be much better for you, too.
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Problems rear their ugly heads every day. The more you deal with them, the better you will get. Life will never get easier. You will only get better at dealing with them. Just like walking. It was a beast at first to get used to, but the more you did it the better you got and now all you have to think about is where you're going.
Once you've dealt with any challenges, they'll either come back again or go away forever. If they come back, you can rely on your experiences. If they don't, then you can help others in the same way.
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Last but not least, I'd like to acknowledge the fact that you are still only one person. If you have someone to help you through your life, you're now 1.1 persons. Not 2. Not 1 1/2, but still more than just yourself. This is because until your life is fully intertwined with the other person, you still have too many vast differences to be able to be 100% for each other. The fun part, though, is getting to that 100%. Don't rush it though.
Patience is a virtue only because without it, one is prone to make premature decisions. Those lead to a lesser quality of life.
Take your time through life. Don't rush things too quickly. Don't forget to smell the roses. The sun did come up today, and it's going to come up tomorrow. The grass is still green. The birds are still chirping. The mud is still wet. The engine is still roaring. And, no matter what, the clock is still turning.
Breathe, and when push comes to shove, go back to the top of this page and calm down.
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